She had a baby and now works at Hooters. She is the poster child for peaking in high school.
I finally looked at the pictures from last night thanks for feeding me and pulling my pants up
Do what your heart wants. . .
My heart wants to rip his balls off and tie therm to his head using his penis
Bad news: I found out that girl you want has a boyfriend. Good news: she'll probably cheat on him with you. Better news: after seeing the way she treats him, that's the most interaction you're going to want with her anyway. Trust me.
Hey I came back and we made joints with the breathalyzers the cops left last night.
Pencil dick carries the name proudly.
You told me to keep you from drinking, but we both know I'm not that kind of friend.
Dressing as mugato from zoolander Halloween you may want to be the hand model. We can get you a fish bowl filled with Clementine Vodka and soda you can put your hand in.
We were banging then all I remember is coming down hard and smashing my top teeth off his forehead. I just rolled off and tapped out. Done-zo
this temple that is my body is starting to crumble and turn into ruins
I'm shopping for Mother's Day cards while waiting for my herpes medication. What is life.
i refuse to sex anyone who doesn't get my lord of the rings references. no exceptions.
Holy shit my cat won't leave the lube alone
Last night I had a dream that a man with an ice cream body entered a bicycle throwing contest and won.
My brain is like a TV with 10 channels, 9 of them are static and the other one just plays that one Nagito Komaeda edit on loop 24/7
Randomize
