well apparently i yelled MY VAGINA WAS ANNIHILATED and his whole family heard
i think i just heard my dad finish in the other room...
oh well at that point I was already depressed with life because I had watched the bratz movie.
For the amount I put out, I should be going on way more dates.
I don't even see the point of going over to his place dressed anymore.
I hope you fall on your chin.
Jealousy makes you ugly.
He says he won't get serious until he screws an Asian and a virgin. I should just place an ad on Craig's List
Wanted: female 18-24 of Asian or partial Asian descent to fuck my ginger boyfriend. Must be willing and able to fake virginity. No emotional connection needed, just sex, just once. Further contact post sex not needed (or particularly desired)
I just pulled the nickels from earlier out of my bra in class. The guy next to me is either terrified or intrigued.
I will give you the couch, a small portion of the fridge, and plenty of beer.
Got my future figured out. I'm oddly comforted. Thanks, bro.
Also, my aunt grabbed my phone and downloaded the scriptures. Apparently I need Jesus.
well some coke just fell out of my nose in my partners meeting so i'd say my day's off to a fantastic start
When I watch porn and jerk off like 95% of the time Iron Chef is on in the background...
Also mom is not happy about me telling her how much i want the women sprinters on the Olympics to beat me up
I was amazing, unlike anything he's ever experienced. I somehow made him feel young and old.and he never felt old before. He feels I will literally kill him. With my magic, lethal vagina.
Idk I've taught my 18 month old how to say nipple so kids aren't all bad
Well, I ruined his toilet and he's still completely okay with me. Plus, it took him like a week to tell me.
If a girl I didn't love ruined my toilet I don't think I'd stick around.
Randomize
