after he passed out we removed everything electronic from his room, stuck in some old books and an ancient typewriter from goodwill. for 20 min. we had him convinced he'd drunk himself backward in time.
after last night, i judge her for not breaking up with me
i've hooked up with him and three of his roommates and not a single one of them knows about it..think its safe to say i found the silver lining in a boys inability to communicate
On a scale of 1 to "bad descision", where does stealing my racist neighbors dog and giving him my roomates dildo for a chew toy rate?
Question: would Brian be pissed if I brought his 17 year old sister as my date to the wedding?
Go for it! You're young. Have fun. Be somebody's expensive hobby like Anastasia Steele.
Do you participate in Sunday morning booty calls?
Dammit! I didn't see this message, of course I do.
Now the circle is complete. Just interviewed a guy who was a higher up member of the team I worked for in my job before this place
I apologize for tapping your ass. It was a friendly tap. Like Casper. Ya know
Remember the thing I sent you? "Often complex problems are best solved by thinking like an animal." Hump away!
I'll be the Broncos and you be the Seahawks and you can pound the shit out of me.
So now I can cross "have my ass be someone's phone background" off the bucket list. You know, if it was something I actually had wanted to happen.
I accused him of not drinking enough alcohol and eating tacos after midnight. I was sober and he's not a gremlin. I would say bad.
We were in a bathroom while 4 dudes compared dick piercings.
Buffalowww
I’m glad they have a happy marriage but why do they have to inflict it on the rest of us?
Randomize
