it doesn't get any better than taco bell and soft core porn
dude, the reading rainbow guy was just talking to a HOLOGRAM
Are you sure you're not watching Star Trek?
wait... oh
it was beautiful and magic like when a hot girl grabs her own tits and smiles at you
just got my goo swallowed for the first time. colors seem so much more vivid now, and more rainbows are outside
you asked the janitor if you could ride his floor cleaner.
WHAT IS PROPER BONG ETIQUETTE FOR WHEN YOU'RE ALONE IN YOUR BATHTUB AND CRYING?
We held a candle light vigil outside the jail hoping for her release, until we realized we were drunk in the jail parking lot.
I have to date her we need a place to stay for tailgating
Hot dogs and hydrocodine is NOT the combo of champions
the amount of times i have been intoxicated, barefoot, and in a robe at 3 am at the quick check by your house is impressive, especially since i live an hour away
party tonight. bring as many traffic cones as you can find. we need to section off the blackout drunks way better this time
I wish you looked at me the way you looked at my brothers penis
Just got offered cocaine at ihop. Stay classy America.
You just kept mumbling about the carpet being covered in stains that looked like the face of God. Until you decided that they were closer in relation to Dumbledore.
He chose me to be his birthday sex..theres a lot of pressure riding on this bang
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