walking on gravel proved too much for her barefeet so she traded her bra for some guys sneakers.
I got to see an enormous amount of vagina this morning.
we couldn't afford a big pool so we bought 2 kiddie pools and put the inflatable beer pong table inbetween. get over here. now.
Yes my plan is to drink the college out of me so i can be an adult by monday
Totally just met the chick getting nailed in our lobby last night. Should I bring it up?
Drunk me was responsible for doing it, but sober me was definitely cheering him on
woke up wearing a canadian flag with the starting forward of the hockey team. i feel oddly patriotic
Things were easy when he was just a penis. Now he's a penis with feelings.
He told me I was 100% better then porn then passed out nto the cake
Well on a lighter note, I had sex in a food truck.
Why are you surprised? I've only ever liked older guys since I was a 3 yr old crushing on her pediatrician.
I poured somre cereal, realized the chocolate to flake ratio was off, tried to fix it by digging through the box, gave up because of the difficulty level, and poured it back in the box. Being high is the best diet.
When I said I wanted you to make noise during sex, I didn't mean mocking ones.
I feel awkward giving career advice while naked
If those panties could talk.
"Once upon a time, Jenny got chlamydia from a magician. The end."
Randomize