I'm going to shit on something weird... I can't wait
After I made out with her she fell asleep and started pooting in her sleep. Are we sure lesbians are hot? Cause that wasn't.
I wanna dance tonight. i just wanna grind my ass in some man's dick.
I faked it too. I just spit on your bed.
I don't remember anything other than how good it felt when I peed my pants.
sometimes i think my sole purpose in life is to cockblock my roommate
I can feel the fear and stress bubbling in my stomach. Or maybe that is the pregnancy.
I don't know what I would do if cheese never existed
Someone's stooooned
She once gave me sex advice over the phone while intoxicated. So no you don't have the cooler therapist.
It's pathetic. My bed hasn't been this sexless since it was in bedmart.
She hash-tagged my name. I think it's safe to say that she remembers our hookup.
we could do so many fantastic illegal things together. sexually and otherwise.
I've been here 11 months and i just realized i have literally never looked at my apartment/roomates sober
What is more embarrassing, shitting yourself in Mexico or having sex in a forest preserve with a 19 yr old? This is crucial research.
I don't get a "my roommate is fucking you" discount?!
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