The walk of shame is so much worse when you've spent the night third wheeling.
Yeah I'm pretty much like lane on gilmore girls except my mom doesn't look so mean all the time.
dude your alot more fun to hang out around now that your addicted to coke...but seriously you need to stop
All I remember is drinking vodka out of tupperware.
I hit 10,000 texts this month.. I think my grandkids have carpal tunnel.
I just got a Community College debit card in the mail. My failure has been materialized.
both the worst and best vomit ever... it was extra chunky and thick cause of the sausage... but it also tasted like delicious sausage... also cause of the sausage
I really hope you aren't where I think you are. Dude she has a MUSTACHE. You need Jesus..
all I know is he gave me a Cialis and tried to take me home.
Did my good deed for the day.. Helped an old guy hide his beer on the NJ transit while the ticket lady came by
You wore a man's plastic top hat last night.
No I didn't. Whiskey did.
I just finished spraying the foam party off my pumps with a garden hose
As Scar once said. Be prepared! For the shit show of what's coming tonight
I just sneeze out a chunk of leftover pickle I threw up last night. dont you try and tell me your day is going worse
She forgot a bra so she just used seran wrap. The scary thing is, it worked.
Randomize
