you screamed 'he won't go on a date with me, but he gave me a free junior chicken'
well imagine, me dating the manager equals free junior chickens for everyone
No, I don't think Michelle is a squirter. And if I've had anal sex, the Obamas have.
and i forgot to tell you that my armpit hair is now completely grown back. man i love winter.
I asked about his 3 inch scar on his chest. It's from when he had to castrate a bull on the estancia. Apparently this is how good bull meat is made.
It looks alright. The blow up doll is in the microwave, and she has forks in her ass
I just banged your sister. Thats what you get for takibg my lunch money in 2 grade, boom, boom fiyyaa powaa
I had to explain to the waiter that I'm not the DD because I can't drive, but as the Designated 'Make Sure No One Gets Roofied Or Hit By A Car On The Walk Home'-er, I should still get the free drinks.
Dude, she gave me a handski that literally felt like she was starting a lawn mower...
Finally another gay clarinet player. They're surprisingly rare.
hoooly shit dude in taco costume challenged alpha douche to a fight. he's got catch phrases. come. now.
He was making Jim beam nachos. Chips soaked in whiskey with cheese
Dude you're fine. You're 5 minutes away from your house and you're eating fig newtons
I'll have sex with you for tacos. I don't care, man.
I never imagine I'd say this, but can I ask Jeff for the butt plugs back even though it was a gift and we broke up?
My mom said "I saw the signs you guys were high, so I made the spaghetti"....so ya, I'd say she definitely knew
Randomize
