So she couldn't stop dragging her teeth while she was blowing me.
Ahh dude, that fucking sucks, what'd you do about it?
Decided to drag my teeth while eating her out... She got the point.
fucking a dude
i mean: fucking a, dude
wow, that comma made all the difference there
i stole $50 bucks from my girlfriends purse to pay for my other girls abortion pill...shes gonna be pissed
just put cider in my bong. gotta love fall
Walk of shame... his parents made me go to church with them first. in my club top sweat pants and slippers. i just slapped god in the face
I'm sorry you missed class, the topic today is copy and paste. I'm not even kidding.
I'm going to start giving girls scratch off lottery tickets when they leave my place in the am. That way they have a chance of not regretting the night before
Somewhere between catching the stove on fire and not being aware of it being on fire while I'm in the living room. I drank too much.
Sorry for trying to give you my dresser last night. Are any of the drawers still in your car?
I tried to interpretive dance to Candy Shop to stop the awkwardness.
But the Super Mario beer pong table is more than appropriate.
I have vodka and explosives. For once, we can blow something up that isn't a blow-up doll.
Strip club, what strip club did I eat a steak at? That's the appropriate question
Welp just ran into my high school history teacher while buying a pregnancy test...there goes my veil of innocence in this town.
high I am. I am yoda. Yoda I am
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