i jus seen this fat chick walk buy look like she had don king coming out her arm pits..
do you think the kids from 7th heaven are mad that dennis and sweet dee are their half-brother and sister?
You don't even understand how penises react in the cold. I'm like a 8 year old boy right now.
Halloween has nothing on dressing up as as the INS on cinco de mayo
he acted like he had never seen anyone snort lines of adderall off of a microwave before. freshman.
my mom just found my flavored lube in the basement. she gave me a lecture about how "giving head is degrading" omg i feel sooooo bad for my dad
i no longer feel bad for not doin my schoolwork. im watching a porn in french. this MUST qualify as studying.
i wanna pet his head its so fluffy. were gonna open a petting zoo
You swear the intervention is for her? I've fallen for that one twice.
What's the most polite way to say "Congrats on losing weight, but no one is happy your boobs got smaller."
He kept falling asleep with the pizza in his hand. I woke him up and told him and he was shocked because he thought he ate it all. Then he would end up falling asleep and we'd repeat the whole process again.
Dude for real though, we gotta stop getting hammered and kissing gay guys.
all I know is this drummer better stop eye fucking me while he plays cowbell. it is way too early for that.
He wants to buy us a microwave. Clearly the man is going to fix my life.
I am never drinking with the goths again.
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