lol you are funny thanks bro I'll take you to a strip club
I don't wanna go to a strip club I'd rather get my boobs free or earn them from a series of good deeds
Ha! What's wrong with that? Hard work deserves compensation. I accept cash, checks, and boobies!
I should have bought two bottles, she left before I could feel her tits...
I'm so tired of dating women who lie about their age. You show up feeling like you need to follow them around with a dust pan and a broom.
I cant wait for the day that I tell my daughter I named her after my favorite porn star.
Chicago was legit, ate some badass pizza and gave a cig to a crackhead..its all i thought it would be
I'm bringing poparts in case anyone gets hungry. The trek to frat row is strenuous.
Well, it's 24 hours till finals. I need high A's on all of them and I still am not sure where exactly on campus most of my classes took place.
Okay my swimming class is like the fatass/diabetic guide to losing 2 pounds by christmas
I found your bra. How you get it off the satellite dish is your problem.
you were telling us about the time you had sex in an alley and he stopped, looked up and said 'it was a cul-de-sac' and went right back to what he was doing.
Um, would you be up for dick jousting? Stefanie is willing to pay 40 bucks.
We all have to be good at something. Mine are writing, drinking, fucking and peer pressure.
Is it bad I'm drunk at orientation
You've been there for 12 hours, what are you supposed to be doing
Not be drunk
and than he said 'I did amateur porn for a while' and I just knew tinder did not fail me this time
Do you remember the bathroom attendant when he put out his hand for a tip and you gave him a high five?
Randomize
