Let me guess--your parents are cousins.
i just traded a sweatshirt for margaritas... why did they ever stop using the barter system??!!
They've started ranking girls from "paper-bag" to "I just came." Please come get me
i woke up surrounded by junior mints. not to mention, there was a huge pyramid of natty cans baracading the door shut. this is why i can't drink alone.
He said that if more girls show up hes not going to ask ages... Spoken like a true sex offender
literally have a bruise on my forehead from being over the toilet all night.
We had sex in front of Notre Dame Cathedral, but I lost my wallet. God giveth and God taketh away.
Sincerely would love to tap that, on a mountain with the wind blowing on your pubes .
I don't care how sexy you think I look in my scrubs. Wanting a blow job is not a medical emergency.
Its mothers day, andI woke up with 12 bar stamps on my face, holding orange juice and a box of tampons. This can not be happening
I DID MY EXPERIMENTING. FOUR YEARS OF IT. IN HIGH SCHOOL.
These beer shits have taken over my entire life.
I AM STRANGELY AROUSED BY THIS UNEXPECTED DEVELOPMENT AND I AM COMPLETELY OK WITH THIS.
My fuck buddy just proposed... Correct me if I'm wrong, but doesn't that completely defeat the purpose of FRIENDS with benefits?
Now you can be friends with Insurance Benefits.
How are you and your magical vagina doing today?
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