they ran out of cups so I just drank out of a cowbell.
Apparently throwing up on your own cape is still a party foul
i have one hour to talk myself into enjoying giving him a blow job when i get home
He DELETED brick breaker off his blackberry why even bother trying to find something in common?
Just got the orientation leader spot. For the first two days, I will be one of the best looking guys on campus. The freshman girls will be so disappointed they settled for me when everyone else comes back.
I figured out that he lasts longer when I rap during sex. He made it all the way through "Love the Way you Lie"
I was just laying in bed wondering if there's more important things in life than cheese stuffed pretzels.
Just found a pack of birth control on the corner of Oakland and Thomas, so if your desperate its up for grabs.
A nap. You broke your hand napping in Vegas.
Thanks for the Beyonce article. In other news, I just passed a man with the state of Florida tattooed on his face.
His status said "sad." of course I liked it. I don't even care that I was the only one. Facebook isn't your god damn journal, we don't care about your problems.
i think we reached that point in our drunkenness where even the creeps found us intolerable
I went next door to get a can opener from them. They opened the door shirtless, asked me if I wanted to a smoke a joint with them. Then decided to make blueberry smoothies. But the yogurt in the blender & the berries, got confused when the berries blended into the yogurt and just kept adding more. Only stopped when we ran out of berries.
At some point i am going to say to you "i have this really bad idea! You in? " just go with it.
I could hear it slapping against his thighs under the robe!!!!!!!!! You are a lucky girl!
Randomize
