Do u think she knows her nickname is the oompa loompa
He can hate all he wants but were fucking with these crocs on
Rocking a Headband at the strip club, because of Rock of Love this shit is like their kryptonite, I smell like stripper butter and back child support.
My husband just tried to seduce me by saying we can do it doggystyle so you can watch tv
I hope no one judges me for becoming a facebook fan of "Adderall" at 5:49 AM...
Its midnight, he's burning water on the stove and keeps yelling at me and telling me not to burn myself.
If its allowed to Tornado at 830am then Im allowed to have a beer and a cigarette at 830am
Wednesdays are like the thursdays of tuesdays... Drink time
Do you think a former stripper/heroin addict constitutes as a high risk sexual partner?
Well, they emptied out the keg by the third kegstand for America.
I may be Daddy's little princess, but doesn't mean I can't be the blowjob queen.
He picked me up went to throw me on his bed. I landed on the wood frame. That's how I broke my rib. We still fucked. Thanks tequila. Best injury ever
What was the name of that place where we saw that concert? It was like a warehouse and some guy was living in the loft above the stage...
It's called: a legit place to drop acid.
Can you come get Dustin he's putting taco bell fire sauce on cigarettes trying to light them again.
Winning pick four numbers were just 6969... if I were 18 I could've won 20,000 dollars.
Randomize