Balls are like the throw pillows of the penis
the women in the ladies room did not appreciate my innovation of turning a sink into a urinal
If you weren't supposed to have sex with your ex then they wouldn't rhyme.
as they left, you opened the door, dropped your pants then yelled "don't leave, this is what you're missing"
When I came home you were using a glowstick to eat peanut butter from the jar.
you said you wanted to feel how much my penis weighed for educational purposes
This theraflu would make for a great margarita.
I can make a sudafedarita
I'm taking a new approach to homewrecking... for science. Or I totally would. I have to see what happens between my ex & his brother when he finds out.
wow, you never really realize how many muscles you have in your crotch until you pull them all.
he stopped talking to me, quit his job, moved out of the province and then told me it was "no big" when I called him apologizing...
I don't know what happened. His phone, shirt, shoes, and the condom wrapper are here but he isn't. I don't even know how to get a hold of him right now
WHAT IS HAPPENING
A FLOCK OF DICKS IS MIGRATING TOWARDS US.
maybe i should limp back to therapy...
oh yeah will you also bring home vodka i wanna do shots on the roof
Think of the things uve done in the past. And ask urself "have I done worse?" If u answer yes. Its perfectly ok.
So you can now add nose to my list of places that cum has gone that it shouldn't...
Randomize