there was 4 little kids screaming in high pitched voices at the top of their lungs at the sox game and their mom just leaned over to me and said 'if thats not birth control i dont know what is'
So yes it WAS her period, NOT a nose bleed.
stop texting me from phones in the verizon store and pretending to be guys i talked to when i was drunk. its confusing.
This place doesnt have redbull or serve shots. Its like they are at war with fun.
truck drivers should not leave their trucks unlocked with cigarettes inside when we're drunk and walking around.
My love will cover her like lulu lemon yoga pants. Casually supportive and always complimenting your Ass.
Why are you surprised? I've only ever liked older guys since I was a 3 yr old crushing on her pediatrician.
I am tired of banking on my penis size to overcome my lack of game.
I feel like the universe head butted me in my balls. That hungover.
.... My lady balls. Cuz I'm a lady.
Dude, please tell me you know why there's a naked chick asleep outside my room.
Our sibling relationship has really blossomed into a wonderful mutual acceptance of sluttyness
WHY HAVE SO MANY THING GONE IN MY BUTT ON THIS TRIP
I found condoms in the back yard from you and your boyfriend. My house isnt a motel
We turned his nipples into a drinking game.
Well the cops were called after the kid fell, but we saw 4 cute guys from our window while it was going down, so it wasn't all that bad.
Randomize
