we put on a show in the hot tub for our boyfriends, then climbed out and both got down on our hands and knees and puked at the same time--still naked.
just spent all of my last class as a college student, vomiting in the bathroom. its moments like these i will cherish
who knew that if you vomit while skydiving the puke goes up towards the people that are behind you.
All I remember is taking a bath, puking in the bath water numerous times while trying to wash myself and I must of eventually given up
why the fuck would he compare you to sexy aquatic creatures?
I think theres a high possibility i could be flammable.
she fucked me tho cuz it was her cat's birthday. As soon as we were done she just says "ahhh tequila tuesdays"
Ski vacations are for hooking up with randoms. It's like I don't even know you
She must've been waiting down the street cause after I said I specialized in inner-thigh-face-massage it couldn't have been 2 minutes until she was on my couch.
We had sex to beyonce's "drunk in love" and then he order me pizza. It was perf
I had to get my boss birth control a work today. I knew going to ASU would come in handy in my career someday.
I can’t believe I made out with a flat earther and didn’t know about it until now!
It's your last night of vacation right? Be the Oprah of dick. And you get a dick... and you get a dick, and you get a dick!!!
I called plan parenthood at 407 am... Guess I was thinking ahead
so idk what that means but now because of me he has a police file as breaking into my apartment and sleeping in my hallway under the carpet
Randomize