What do they do with the elephants that die at the zoo
Cremation, why do you ask?
I think we have a bit of a problem
just wrote on a church. and then stalked a boy, by the way, i fucked him. him being your friend, also, love tacos.
Sex on a trampoline was so worth getting a mosquito bite on my penis
never thought i'd see a ''climb of shame'' until she came down from the attic in front of the whole party..
Professor took us out for drinks. She said if I ordered the 64oz "Call a Cab," she'd give me an A. I drank it in 5 minutes. A+?
I didn't scare your mother by showing up on the roof, did I?
she said she walked into the kitchen and i was sitting ass naked on the floor chugging her parents vodka.
Just listened to a full Christian rock song, loved it,listened to the dj send a prayer to a 4th grader who was having a tough year and realized I'm high as fuk
And I was like "take off the damn flower crown, we're about to have sex not post an indie picture on tumblr"
why not an indie porn pic then
Holy shit, I just successfully took and sent a boob pic AT MY DESK I have conquered an entire new level of skill.
For a second I thought I had fallen asleep on the floor and freaked out. Then I thought somehow I was on drugs. This is my life.
Got lost on the way to my dealer again. He stayed on the phone with me untill i found him and then hooked it up because I got lost.. What a genuine person.
What use have I for dignity? It just get's in the way of the really fun stuff.
I got sriracha sauce on my mask while I was eating fast food, now wearing it makes me hungry
Just letting you know that while you peed your pants in that guys jeep, The orgasm I had made my hair fall out... Good morning.
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