I just went to a chocolate syrup wrestling party I think you need to get on my level
It was great. Even bought me breakfast in the AM
From?
Well, he didn't exactly take me out, but left a $20 on the table...
She posted on her FB that he moved out...It's like she wants me to fuck him.
I had a guy present me his prison release form this morning as id
Can we end it on a good note at least? Can we fuck and then never talk again?
fat chick, vomit on the dog, and three unidentifiable pills in my ear. all in the same ear. what the hell happened after the guests showed up?
This drunk girl wants you to know that I do actually like you. I'm not just using you for sex. I think you're cool.
My worst fear almost came to light...I was choking and the cats stared at me like they had no problem eating my face if I died
is there a line between daddy kink and oedipus complex?
IM GOING TO SIT ON YOUR FACE AND CHANT 'I BELIEVE THAT WE WILL WIN'
I just used a gift card from my in-laws to buy their daughter a vibrator. What even are morals?
He woke me up holding a gallon of apple juice and a shot glass...
I'm glad we smoked together,that was probs the biggest sibling bonding we will ever have.
There's a big difference between a penis and a toilet.
He is obviously into the really short sex we have.
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