I dont kno what was worse. Waking up 2 a guy next to me thinking I got blackout or realizing it was your boyfriend.
# days @ Coachella: 1 people i showed how to break it down: 279
Grab the Coors Light. Its time to get NASCAR drunk
i'm gonna be such a cougar when i'm older...i just facebook stalked my little sister's 13 yr old boyfriend while drinking a bottle of wine....
just spent all of my last class as a college student, vomiting in the bathroom. its moments like these i will cherish
not only did i soak my thesis by spilling celebratory shots on it, but i also stained it with lipstick making it obvious i tried to drink the vodka off it......dgaf, worth it.
so there is either a lot of blood or a lot of wine in the shower....
I shouldn't have to thank you for taking off your captain hat off before we had sex
I feel like it'll be a success as long as she doesn't end up dead in a ditch. There has to be a line somewhere.
Now some guy that's in my phone as " Alex lip ring hot" is texting me and I don't where life is taking me
I just licked wine off my own thigh. I've hit a new low.
My disapointment is making my balls hurt :(
it's unicorns you uncultured swine
His balls will have been in my mouth at least once by this time tomorrow.
Hypothetically speaking of course, is it bad if a cat eats lube?
Randomize
