I think drunk me is telling hungover me something... I just have to crack the code.
Because of no shave november, it's no boys december... pay back
i just deleted quailman, hot hawaiian dude, appalachian swimmer, and connecticut from my phone
Don't judge me. It was less weird than it sounds when we were in the moment and it was his birthday
Look what our sorority has done to us...we're hitting on girls in hopes of getting an awesome little.
His balls looked like two miss shaped chicken nuggets
We proceeded to buy tattoos from the dollar store and interpretive dance to of monsters and men, it's safe to say he's my new fuck buddy
Had a dream I beat up niall then madeout with him while snorting coke out of a dragons egg
I have alcoholic tendencies but you know what? College
i turned around and there he was, right in my face. i was mid deep throat of a hot dog that i was eating with my hands and no bun. you win FSU, you win.
He was stoned and starts screaming, "I ain't got but a dollar, I wanna hear waterfalls!". Maybe he can hang with us....
He was super adorable, like I wanna pinch his cheeks while I fuck him...
I'm feeding a baby and swiping on tinder...what has my life come to?!?!
Long story short I ended up getting choked out by a really hot guy in the girls bathroom at a bar last night
MANIFESTATION IS REAL AND IM GETTING LAID TONIGHT
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