Dude she looked like Jerry Garcia's knuckles
It's just you. You wear the fuck me fedora and wear baller shorts, hollywood hippie who thinks she is shakira when she's drunk.
I can't believe believe she called me a slut. She doesn't know anything about me or my life.
Shit, that's something a lot of sluts say.
Denmark girl wants me to go out but i remembered shes a raging whore with extremely questionable morals. Not feelin that tonight
it was a sick party until you insisted on putting on "that's how I beat shaq"
ew. I made a sandwich, and the cheese reminded me of her vagina
They pulled him over whille he had a fish tank full of beer in his front seat. He told them it coudn't count as an open container cause the top was on it.
Theres two guys using a blow up doll to hold their beers while they float around the pool
Im on my way, tell them to get ready for a high-five
we made out inside of a kiddie slide for about 20 mins. it was the sexiest, most suffocating experience I've ever had
His penis makes me feel like a mystic dragon sliding down a turbo slide covered in white gumdrops and sour cashews
Same.
Going through my bras is like traveling back in time through my past hookups and relationships....
I think my penis runs off weed. I haven't smoked it 3 days and I have no sex drive what so ever
How does one hint at their mentee that they used to casually fuck his brother
Oh my god.. Saw a commercial for Captain Morgan. Made me gag a little bit.
i had to call the bar to ask if they found my bowling ball. That good of a night
Randomize
