omg. I had the wrong window open and I accidentaly posted my credit card # on twitter
Whats your twitter name
summer is not the time to consider going full bush.
I may have been to starbucks and 2 classes with balls still written on my face...
There is only so much cookie dough and masturbating I can handle in one night.
he said he "kind of had sex before.. Barely" i think it was one of those situations where you slide into home and get tagged out.
so i never found you. but i found vodka. so its kinda the same
I have minimal recognition and a lot of burns on my tongue and my vagina hurts.
Puked in the hotel lobby and just kept walking. I love mardi GRAS.
Jello bowls to the fucking face, that or ramen spiked with liq. Those are the only options in this house.
When we were done making out, some guy ran into the room yelling, "I'll save you Brandon! I'll save you!"
New hot neighbor boys moving in across from us...So i did the logical thing and bought two 30 packs up the hill and walked right by em. Consider the line hooked and ready to reel.
Sounds like she has 4 first names. Like a sad version of Ricky bobby
The amount of times I have been emergency drunk in the past 72 hours is staggering
I am naked and annoyed.
He asked me to come stay with him so he could "see that ass and watch Harry Potter."
Randomize
