how do you wash the taste of whore out of your mouth?
what did gay clubs do before lady gaga
He looks like the kind of guy that would jack off to weird things.
In need of cum proof mascara. Don't judge me.
I'm not leaving bed today. And i guess my drunken ass last night hit my roommate in the face with a tiki torch then proceeded to cry while carrying around a picture of he who must not being name. I'm a piece of work.
Do you think drinking vodka, rum and sourpuss out of a water bottle, in a class that isn't even mine rude?
She can't brag about all the anal sex she has and then expect me not to awkwardly stare at her boyfriend when she brings him around
BUT YOU MUST FINISH YOUR QUEST
TO FIND THE HOLY GRAIL
AND GET DRUNK OFF YOUR ASS BY DRINKING OUT OF IT
"Where are you? Where are my keys? What is this guys name again? Why am I wearing two pairs of your pants?"
He came so hard that he yelled what sounded like a spell from Harry Potter.
Being able to fart in her presence and not be judged is why I pay half the rent.
That moment when a stripper is the one that makes the two of you have to define the status of your relationship...
All I remember is receiving a lap dance to slow motion.
I'm not the type to go to a guys house...in your case his boat...and sleep with them..I mean I have in the past but I'm trying to be more serious and grown up
I offered to trade my cat for a bottle of tequila as long as it had a handle on it and realized I had a problem
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