please pick me up with an explanation of why i shacked in a trailer with a guy who doesnt have a car.
I'm watching a show called "I didn't know I was pregnant" on TLC...Apparently this happens enough that there is a series
I just saw a guy give a mop to his fat wife and say "Look, an exercise stick!"
Still workable. Pretty sure i told her i'd eat her out in the woods.
You know why I moved here? No public intoxication law. A cop just helped me from my bent over vomit pose, asked if I was ok, and gave me a ride home.
Lmao the neighbor heard yall last night She wanted me to tell you way to finish strong
We blazed in her bathtub. All 5 of us. Not easy bro
We found him in the neighbors shed using a bicycle as a blanket. We just left him there.
If you come home soon there's a stripper in the shower. Don't be alarmed
I just want to trick people into going on dates with me so they can bring back to their houses and let me use their wifi.
Sure go ahead and start this 'business' with him...just don't come crying to me when you have to fake your own death in two years
We had sex on a dog bed..
Its okay I found my bra. ...it was on your cat. I wont ask questions.
I don't have a cat..?
In other news I was masturbating last night and came really fucking hard to the thought of yelling at a customer....
We are balling out on levels, I think mikes about to go to jail. something to do with a unicorn and rainbows, the cops are not being reasonable.
Randomize
