I think the phrase "bag of smashed assholes" describes it best
yea..i want to get out of new york for a bit too but for the love of god not to new jersey. that's like getting tired of the stripclub and getting yourself a toothless prostitute.
We went into lab today and when no one was looking i touched our cadaver's penis!
I love waking up with his head head between my legs, it makes me feel special
i drank out of a bidet.
I have 39 hot sauces from Chipotle
It's like earning obesity badges
I'm watching the Brazzers version of Mary Poppins and enjoying it. Volume on and all. 45 minutes.
I was going through my settings and the phone randomly started playing "Crazy Little Thing Called Love" by Dwight Yoakum. Out loud. At full volume. I was shitting. There were 3 other people in the bathroom. I love iOS 7.
I fucked him twice and then he set me up with his teammate. This kid does wonders for me
Two of my roommates are waxing their vaginas in the living room. Can I come smoke?
I'm determining which apartments I'm mostly to move into based on how suitable the kitchens are for sex .
he made that chewbacca noise when he came. like father like son i guess.
Lets just say the phase, What a dick, has a whole new meaning at the urinals.
you missed a good time last night.
you texted me at 10 telling me to come fuck you, that says enough.
They have a shelf full of jello shots, what have i gotten myself into
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