He's still on the phone with him. This is unnatural. Dudes don't call other dudes just to talk.
school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
All I want for christmas is my sobriety back.
A guy in a sombrero stopped to take a picture with me sitting on the curb.
You insisted we put glow sticks on you so that we didn't lose you if you went pee in the dark.
I didn't ride the struggle bus so much as drive it backwards off a cliff.
That awkward moment when the dude you blew on camera in college friend requests you on Facebook.
Who is this?!????
That awkward moment when you think you're texting a friend the above statement, but instead you text a stranger.
I got an assistant at work. First task was picking me up at a strip club. I was drunk and trying explain how it was work related
Also bring a pizza or no entry to my vagina OR the fort.
Cheese only
Also I can show up hungover, fall asleep at my desk, and smell like a bottle of whiskey, and they still like me more then my shitty co worker
The sad moment you remember you have no power for a week and can't flush.....
Wrong number bro but that sounds like a damn shame.
I woke up with sticky red stuff all over my sheets, face, and chest. Apparently after I blacked out I thought eating ribs in bed was a good idea
You are talking to me during sexting hours. Be careful, innuendos are taken seriously
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
Are you drinking tequila at 1pm? ...at Disneyland?
Randomize
