You only like me because I'm a challenge
You already blew me
Dude, she's just using you for your money, and Cavs tickets.
Honestly, what else do I have going for me?
You make a valid point.
I really should sober up and deal with this hangover
It seems to be one of those life decisions I'm perfectly content never making though
James and whatshisface bought me drunks. I am drinks.
If I'm gonna go to jail I'm gonna be wearing a poncho
#1 benefit of having an equality sticker on my car: some girl flashed me while i was driving home
I knew he cared when I got his text "happy birthday to the girl who gives phenomenal head"
I try new drugs instead of new boys. That way you can't scold me about the importance of condoms
I feel like that's something that he should've asked me over dinner..... instead of with his hand down my pants? maybe not
all I know is this drummer better stop eye fucking me while he plays cowbell. it is way too early for that.
Oh, and let me go get some popcorn, watching you make your own decisions should be quite the shitshow.
As much as my throat was opened up this weekend, you'd think I wouldn't nearly choke on a damn almond.
That's not "anything", that's you deep throating a mozzarella stick.
He took me out to dinner to tell me we had to stop fucking so randomly
Honestly wish he pleased me as much as queso does
Shame - the story of my life.
Randomize
