I'm thinking of writing "I have herpes" on my stomach in sharpie that way I'm not tempted to show my tits tonight
And theres a reasonable expectation that if you're fighting over a pair of yoga pants on the ground at VS someones gonna videotape it
Dunno why I keep hitting snooze. It's never gonna give me the kind of sleep I need to be sober.
I think we did. All i know my pants smell like pong water due to the bathroom extravagansa. God I feel like a whore.
the only thing you said was do the helicopter dick
Shower sex is an art that should not be attemted drunk
did you just send me my own nude
Apparently it's not a "bonding moment" when you realize you use the same porn site as your boyfriend
I talked to the pizza guy for 10 minutes about my truck, I don't even have a truck
I feel like I shouldn't be encouraging my friends to hook up with their teachers.....but if it's for academic reasons....then I definitely encourage it.
Getting blackout drunk infront of my family was never on my bucket list, but now that I've done it I'm cool with it.
also, I think I lit my hair on fire when I got home..
I wasn't going to drink. Then there was alcohol so I gave that up.
We have been dating for 5 months. I'm friends with his sister. Yet my number in his phone is still saved as "hot bartender"
What's a really polite way of saying "you have gravely overestimated the value of your vagina?"
Randomize
