called my therapist. she asked if I was sad bc of m.j.'s death. are ppl that pathetic?
you need more empathy. some people get depressed for reasons OTHER than being a whore.
I just had an epiphany. There is NOTHING TO STOP ME from making cake mix and eating it all instead of making a cake. It feels like my entire life has peaked at this moment.
they had a keg party to fund her abortion.
do you have any idea how expensive it is to have the munchies at Disneyland?
yeah, it's no longer just 'day drinking' when it's 5pm and you're knocking over fruit displays at fresh market
i was driving around baked, windows down jamming to third eye blind and eating grapes for 35 minutes before i remembered why i left my house
Dude, Taco Bell gave me a free fiesta potatoes when I won a bet on wether I could fit the entire rim of a cup in my mouth.
Have you ever had one of those moments when you kept whispering to yourself "I'm not a slut, I'm not a slut..."?
So I fucked her. If you're keeping score at home, it's all tied up with horrible sex with someone I like and great sex with someone I hate both with 1.
He also turned out to be underage (the fucking liar) so we had to get drunk on cooking sherry
When I said I wanted you to make noise during sex, I didn't mean mocking ones.
I'm sure there are thousands getting dick today in the name of independence
WE HAVE TO LEAVE. I HAVE HAD SEX WITH WAY TOO MANY PEOPLE IN THIS BUS STATION.
I think I was just motorboated by a 4-year old girl.
Don’t get me wrong—I love silver and bracelets—but handcuffs are not a good look on me…
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