She was lying the whole time!
She was a great actress
I was a great dumbass
I don't make mistakes...just understandable bad choices.
My breakfast consisted of a slimfast and an adderal. My fridge is like an insecurity buffet.
i feel as if its time to shave my pubes but i should wait until before the party. nobody likes a sloppy drunk girl with a stubble-crotch.
story of my life.
I just realized I have my pepper spray, gun, and vibrator all in one drawer. One false grab and I'm screwed either way.
I just took my friends on a tour of all the places I've had sex in my house. I dont know if that's more slutty, or the fact that it took 2 hours to complete..
He left with a pair of dress shoes, some goggles, and a shot glass. I think we should follow him.
the laptop wouldn't balance on his lap. that's how well endowed he is.
We haven't even moved into the apartment yet and she has already screwed two of our neighbors. This is going to be the longest 12 month lease of my life.
Blah blah blah. Just come home and put a baby in me.
2013: the year of legs covered in hair and pregnancy scares.
She asked me if I would fuck her with my storm trooper mask on
I just quoted part of the Pokemon theme song in a sext... And it worked
she's my really slutty friend i bring around so i can act slutty and not feel as bad about it
For someone who's supposed to be gay Greg is really good at seducing me into things I don't wanna do
Randomize
