I decided to name my penis gatorade...is it in you?
Fuck their fairy tale bullshit. I shall ruin it. With a few thrusts of my cock.
Can someone please explain to me why I woke up looking like Ziggy Stardust
so... thinking about masturbating finally
taking the losers way out I see
when she asked me if it was possible to swim under north america i knew it was time to leave.
The lawn was on fire, but I fixed it.
beware of the wheat thins...there might be a knife in it
he asked you how you felt and you yelled "I FEEL SO PROACTIVE!" and started coloring with sharpies
im failing my bio class b/c he booty calls me wednesday nights at 6 like clockwork
jake and the teradactyl broke up, operation get high and find him a new girl who hasn't had sexual experiences with three delts simultaniously is in full effect.
he left a full can of coors light underneath my windshield wiper, like a love note. if that's not husband material, i don't know what is
What type of bandaid should I use on my clit
Give it up bro. I’m not wearing pants or a bra and only an act of god could change that
Realization: many of my behaviors would lead to me being stoned to death in a lot of foreign countries. God bless America.
this old people party is bangin. they have apple cider with everclear in it
Randomize
