Sometimes I feel like I shouldn't drink when I come out of a black out half naked covered in puke. Then I realize thats why I drink.
jack dropped his pants and said "bet u've never seen a dick this big." which was really sad cuz i had never actually seen one that small...you have like pinch it between ur thumb and pointer finger to give a HJ
they found her hiding behind the couch trying to feed a cabbage patch doll a bottle of tequila. please tell me she's on birth control.
i just put all of my beerlympics medals into my academic awards box. i would say they are my greatest achievement since college.
The only reason I give him head is because I know i'll get a back rub.
wow.
But it's a REALLY good back rub.
now that we've slept with the entire soccer team i think its time to expand the horizon.
Does your throat ever get sore from being choked too hard or do u think I'm just getting sick??
Aaaaand that would be the most of my hand I've ever fit into a vagina before.
I think I suffocated him while I was riding his face
Just saw a hooker eating a pastrami sandwich walking down beach blvd blowing kisses to traffic. My day = made
I cried over the lack of milkshakes I've consumed in the last month
Officially the best daughter ever. I just restocked my parents alcohol that I stole last night AND ADDED TO IT
he's a mother fucking interior design major!! we boned and fell asleep and now we're laying in bed discussing what color i should paint my room. i'm marrying him
So nothing to worry about, but i'm probly going to jail soon, just thought i should let you know so you didn't worry. Bye!
I can see. My condolences to your vagina.
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