apparently when i got back to tyler's i layed face down on the bed and yelled "don't hurt my asshole!"
Pot didnt help. Now Im even sadder but now im afraid of the clouds and the crickets.
Cant decide who was more of a mess the morning after... me when i passed out in the bathroom stall or you when you sprayed yourself down with hairspray thinking it was sunblock
So add panera bread to the places i love to eat that i am potentially banned from.
im hiding in a corner. drunk. with a plate of stolen jello shots. im pretty sure people are looking for me or the jello shots.
I figured out why I insisted on leaving my sweater on the ground outside. I smelled it and I'm 97% sure I peed on it last night
Text me back. Urgent. It is a porta Keep the portal alive.
Is this the acid talking?
Always wear a seatbelt when giving road head. I think I'm just going to tell people I don't remember how I got the fat lip.
There's a bus with a band full of dancing women in bras. I think I like it here.
I can't remember dinner
Hahaha "rub in the ketchup on your face, It'll just look like blush." some gay waiter said that to you, and you go "good idea!"
I'd probably lick every tooth in Carly Rae Jepson's fucking mouth.
Teen Choice Awards are on if your wondering.
We found Mulan.
I thought you were in bed what the hell
My only regret this past weekend is abusing only 3 substances when I could have done so much more.
Just jacked in the family restroom in the hospital while eating beef jerky and looking at reddit gone wild.
She gave me a roadie as we drove home from fireworks. People were still lighting off their displays as we drove by. I love America.
Randomize
