How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
My vagina is so ashamed right now. It won't even look at me.
Her bacne/racne was so bad it was like having sex with bubble wrap.
you told his mom that the only thing he wants for christmas is his dick in your mouth
Whenever someone from high school gets pregnant or has a pregnancy scare my self esteem grows a good 5 points
yeah my parents were only ten feet away and we somehow managed to do it in five different positions without them noticing
My drug dealer is spending the weekend in my studio apartment. I feel like I've crossed a line that should never be crossed.
just got super drunk mixing jägermeister with my lyme disease meds. even if my face goes paralyzed, at least i got smashed from it.
The difference between what I would do for a regular Klondike bar and an Oreo flavored Klondike bar is astounding
Im in the bathtub drunk. Less than an hour before the interview. This will be the best or worst career move ever., support?
Two word: claymation porn. Think about it.
I don't think I can ever express my appreciation for the things you text me.
So my mom wants me to come swim with dolphins with my little sisters in October. I'm not sure how to tell her I saw a "when dolphins attack" special when I was rolling and am now terrified of them.
I have my vibrator between my thighs and I'm listening to high school musical. That kind of high. We're all in this together.
It's been awhile, you pregnant yet?
No,she came up with a new game: "Where is the most interesting place I can show Drew my asshole?"
Randomize
