their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
This is a mass text. Does anyone know where I am?
you know it is a bad morning when you forget to brush your teeth and eat old gas x in your car because its minty...
dont try to nair your balls. i speak from experience
In a meeting with the accounting department. This shit is even more boring in real life and there isn't a professor to wake me up.
it's all just a bunch of faces and i remember what the floor looked like.
i remember getting really pissed off when you wouldn't let me sleep in the garage with your cat.
my self respect just called, its having a good time without me
Fuck you, jack daniels. I feel like satan laid an egg in my brain.
What goes on in that head of yours?
Gay sex, for the most part. Why?
I'm just saying, no one has ever made me laugh or cum as hard as you do. Sometimes at the same time which I didn't know was possible. Is there even a word for that besides love?
We're eating jello shots in the library. I love the day after Valentine's
I got to her place and she was petting her cat and pounding vodka out of the bottle. She looked like Dr evil in yoga pants. She's nuttier than squirrell shit.
Drug test isn't today. Now I'm just sitting in this orientation with a bag of your piss in my pants
but dude how did I get so drunk?
Pretty sure it happened right after you poured a shot of Wild Turkey into your Budweiser, chugged it, and screamed "I. NEVER. BACK. DOWN!"
Randomize
