Get out of your relationship and into my pants.
Someone left a shot of disaronno in a champagne glass here this morning... flip a coin?
it never fails, everytime he manages to fuck my earrings out of my ears.
My econ prof just gave me a shot glass because I was the "randomly picked" winner of the lecture. Ties into our supply and demand lecture, supplied with a shot glass, demand a thirsty thursday
Say what you want, but those Fraggle Rock DVDs have gotten me laid twice.
you might as well be a hobo. you were covered in pee last night hanging out on the stairs drunk.
right. well we all have our lows.
she asked him to cuddle cuz she was cold and instead he got up, moved the space heater to her side of the bed, and went back to sleep
No. I think its because I really and truly know that he is a moron and his future prospects are zoo animals.
After Madison dropped a bottle of full vodka an it shattered on the floor, it was quiet for literally 3 min straight and then drew said "the booze gods have spoken"
If we all have the time, and the weather permits, and you have no plans, we should have another go at Operation Get Our Carless Friends Laid. All the lonely people will be out. We can take our lonely people out too.
please come here right now, that girl who always gets her boob out is here and she brought taco bell
Sharknado 3 is going to bring us to alcoghol poisonign
Congrats you've received dick pics from an Olympic silver medalist
I might need to come puke in your toliet on the way home
Can you recommend a quality dick? I haven’t had a good sexing in a while
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