hes 24 and dating a highschool junior and keeps saying how happy he is. happy about what? her ACT score??
I feel like our bond is deeper now that we're both sleeping with married men. now we're really bffls
just got dressed up for chatroulette- THAT desperate.
I just got home. Seriously all I remember is taking out my contacts and putting your balls in my mouth.
You were chewing up hot dogs and spitting them out
if u cant get laid at this wedding we need to have a looooooong talk about the possibility of u becoming a lesbian
his roommates said i can move in if i promise to only drink tequila the rest of the semester. challenge accepted.
Good news! I don't have Hep C! Better news! I still hate you!
I am going to dream of scrotums tonight, I just know it.
Why were you eating a hot dog in the bathroom at 230 am?
My roommate was sleeping, I thought it would be rude
Don't worry I sent a creepy stalker message to a guy I slept with 6 years ago, Sunday Funday rock bottom
I've decided if you aren't here in fifteen minutes I'm leaving you for Mario the 75 year old Colombian bartender.
Details are irrelevant. Come bail me out of jail.
I have dined. Now I want to get fucked.
I may have been bent over an elementary school lunch table a few weeks ago. Don't judge.
Randomize
