no. you can't hotbox the world.
So I just used shazaam to figure out a pairs figure skating song. I don't think I could get any gayer.
happy birthday! Any relationship between us is now officially illegal.
I didn't know it was possible to make picking up dog shit look sexy.
She did the bend and snap...
i definitely just woke up with half of a cigarette tucked underneath my balls. Last night must have been interesting
Admitting I go to nursing school is my subtle way of saying, yes, I know every muscle in your penis and how to effectively use them.
Bren left me with a lovely parting gift. Newfouund alcoholism. I'm on the kitchen floor, hugging a bottle of vodka. It's my only friend now.
Did you leave your blow razor here? I need it for crafts.
I'm now drinking beer through a straw. By order of the bartender.
Nothing says summer like lemonaid, but nothing says fuck yeah summer like lemonaid and vodkavodka
Carver called his mom a milf again
Was it on purpose this time?
Good, I don't think Coke dipped ring pops hold up in the mail anyway.
So I fucked a guy with his mouth wired shut last night never thought id cross that off my imaginary bucket list
still drunk on my way to class to give my presentation on the negative affects of alcohol on the body. hell yes.
I could not add him. He gets 5 likes on Instagram.
Randomize
