the pool opens at 11. by 1115 the ambulance had been called.
we were exchanging secrets last night... she told me about how she put markers in her vaj in middle school. found a keeper.
so would me posting the photos of the cock and coin jar incident be completely out of the question?
How do you set tits on fire ? I swear her tits were on fire.
I swear they were about to hook up!!
I know because I was in the tub taking an imaginary silent bath. They stopped cuz I gagged on my shot.
Have you seen Dave? He's not on top of the bar anymore but I found his shirt.
If you're asking how many times you took off your clothes and played with the tiki torches.....the answer is 3.
I drunkenly called my ex on Skype last night and didn't talk, just smiled real big at him until I fell asleep.
Apparently getting a blow job in the mens room from the bar owners daughter will get you kicked out.
Awkward drunk fist bump with the boss. Not sure if tomorrow will be weird or wonderful.
If he would've shaved his beard when we first broke up, getting over him would've been so much simpler. That asshole.
I never thought in a million years that I would have a threesome with my boss and his wife and yet here we are.
He wants another date...I mean he's cute, but I just am not ready to give up my glamorous single-girl lifestyle here.
you mean the one where you drink out of the carton and don't wear pants?
Yeah, and pee with the door open. It's the little things.
You have to get it done early. Like a dick drive by. Hit it and run.
You have such a talent for this
Friendship, or finding weed?
Yes
Randomize
