"Reality" and all separate lives are the same thing?... We all have separate realities?! My life Has one reality and yours has another?
Haha how much did you smoke
4 feet of smokeee!
Puking blue powerade in mcdonalds parking lot to the applause of the guy taking out the trash with man in the mirror blasting in the background. Good morning stl
the not having weed thing wouldnt be nearly as tragic if it wasnt the one holiday where they launch bright flaming things into the air
u think ur still drunk from last night? i just put the eggs in the freezer and the remote in the sink. I don't wanna fucking hear it.
I want to apologize in advance in the event I put my boobs in your face
But Alex is drunk in Philly and I told him to come see me so that's "first-love,-drunk,-high,-and-it's-a-snow-day-hook-up-with-an-ex" points. 69
I came in your room, you looked at me and said "I fucked up" and then some kid showed up and took you to the hospital
He's grinding topless with a group of girls to that discovery channel song. May I take a message?
I don't really want to talk about it, but if anyone finds my unicorn mask with my bra in it, I would really like that back.
We dated for a month and a half. he didn't like blow jobs. I honestly don't think he was human.
I actually haven't slept with anyone in a while. I think my whore phase is just seasonal.
you don't go into accounting for the pussy....
Ok maybe now I get why I'm single I think I just broke a rib pooping
I associate the Game of Thrones theme song with his dick now.
So just spent 30 minutes of my life talking to my cousins friend who told me she buys cocaine from a pizza place by asking for extra Parmesan
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