Dub. In the bra. Dub in the bra.
That arnold schwarzeneger picture looks strikingly similar to paul
Not half as good looking as paul
I'd say paul has bigger bicep peaks, but who am I to judge
in the 'for' section of the check i put "when we got drunk and broke things". again im sorry.
I couldn't remember if it was hamsters or Iraq that you hated. I'm so sorry.
His dick was as big as my arm. Giving him a handjob was like giving someone an Indian sunburn.
Kate gave me a 3 day old cup of tequila last night and forced me to chug it. P.s. i drew u a picture
A Bum and I jusst hugged. its not even 8 pm.
Maybe. This hangover is made of nightmares and that thing from the Alien movies.
It feels like eating ice cream while riding a unicorn over a rainbow waterfall made of glitter.
That is possibly the gayest thing that was ever thought of by anyone anywhere.
Hey I came back and we made joints with the breathalyzers the cops left last night.
I left the bar I'm on a bench across from the bowling alley taking a nap please come get me. I've had three lollipops.
Is it bad i hate my job so much I'm actively trying to get fired tonight by drinking all the booze we have so I don't have to show up for my double tomorrow. Four mango vodkas later I have decided I'm a better server drunk.
Hungover. No words. Just memes.
Some Romanian guy at work just told me "you come my house, we drink beer and you come make fuck with my sister"
If he's not there watching you go for it. It's been a while bro.
I'm not sure what happened. There's a frozen waffle in the floor and he's walking around with a curtain rod and making planes out of bread slices...
Randomize
