best part, i was ridiculous and none of them were judging me bc they didn't want my vagina. it was like i was a pretty painting
Tonight must have been good, I have already had two cups of coffee but still couldn't figure out how to operate a door.
we talked about european history as he fucked me from behind in the shower... i think it was a success
This kid is drunk.
I hope by "this kid" you mean yourself and not some child you have kidnapped and gotten wasted.
he's mad because you were 'slandering his penis'.
He went to WalMart with $30 and came back with a watch, a basketball and an engagement ring.
IM SO HIGH RIGHT NOW, IM WHAT ROCKET MAN WANTED TO BE WHEN HE GREW UP. ELTON JOHN CAN BLOW ME.
I told him I had an IUD and he asked me how was a bomb a form of birth control..
HOW CAN YOU EXPECT ME TO KEEP YOUR SECRETS IF YOU KEEP ON TELLING ME THEM.
Is there such thing as dick sucking teeth guards?
I volunteer to be the person who breaks into the room and runs around naked and has to be escorted out by police.
You had sex with a Scottish dude with a peg leg....how could I NOT tell that story??
You is single now. The world is your ass buffet.
How was the tequila? Are you making bad decisions yet?
It’s a 10 inch dick! Of course I’m getting a Brazilian
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