But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
woke up and her hair clip was clamped around my shaft
i asked him how he could stand the smell of skunk. his answer was "it smells like good weed"...
Somebody was walking their dog with their car. seriously
You tried to get the stranger on the sea bus to give you a bite of his chicken sub by repeating over and over "im in a girl band"
She gave me a handjob while eating a mcdouble with mayo on the way home from the bars at 2 in the morning. Car was full of people. This could be forever
I hope no one at work will be able to read the "who wants body shots" on my chest. I forgot about it.
Beer and cheesecake and spinning in cirlcles why did you let me do this to myself
I just ate powdered extacy out of my wallet. I think I might have for a second of my reasonable life been on your level.
I'm putting you on my Emergency card so i can spend the last ounce of strength in my hospital bed to flip you off.
i'm hungover but need to study so i had a vodka orange juice, three ibuprofen and an adderall for breakfast. what up med school
my ex's current girlfriend held my hair as I threw up. new low.
I had the bathroom of girls sing you happy birthday while you puked. I couldn't stop laughing. They were all so supportive
I don't need romance, I need cheese sticks
I tried to cut you?! I'm sorry! PS where's my hair?
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