Haha dude youd die if you were here. Girl presenting is defending the new testament and did her report on JESUS. best believe i'm gonna ask some hungover, atheist ass questions
she insisted that i refer to her boobs by name.
do you think you could subtly ask him about the dimensions of his penis?
Note to self not a good idea to try and make out with a girl when she's crying over her boyfriend
Blew a line and having a jolly rancher... the day is looking up.
like a dude with a badge in a golf cart is gunna do shit. Unless he has a tazer. Then it's fair game.
We didn't even make it to the door before they came out saying we weren't allowed in because of last time..
I wasn't going to take him home until I heard "hung like a water buffalo" then curiosity got the best of me.
I just realized I turned down a booty call too. To make cheesecake. God help us all
I just want to have such an intense orgasm that my heart stops and I die. I mean that would kind of suck for the guy I'm fucking but then again he could be like "I'm that good"
Can we put this graduation on the shelf figuratively and go drink
please come back they are interrogating me about masturbation
It's a good thing you're straight. You'd make a horrible lesbian.
Oh god he’s a clown I fucked a rodeo clown
last night i was way too drunk and i was forcing people to let me tell them about mammals
Randomize