that's fine. btw we still need $500 for the donkey...
And by the way, how is me getting head even remotely comparable to you fucking 3 guys?
the bank didn't screw up, i spent 150$ at mcdonalds last night
He asked if I wanted to leave my bra on while we were doing it from behind bc he read somewhere that all that pounding can be painful for big breasts. THAT thoughtful.
i proceeded to stick my hands in his pants while he continued to repeat i have a girlfriend
I feel like today should be a " im going to have sex with you cause its raining and theres nothing else to do" kinda day
my heaven will be filled with hot naked men covered in chick-fil-a sauce and me wearing a bib
I believe nudity is frowned upon at that establishment
Some guy offered you 100 bucks last night to suck your toes. I had to drag you away while you were yelling at me, "Stop money cock blocking me!"
That's just where I'm at in my life.
Because Kyle had a tattoo kit at his house and I wanted one and all he could draw was a mustache or a stickman on fire
thank you for extending my knowledge of the effects of vodka. speak of what happened last night and i will kill you and send your fingers to your loved ones.
I have the starring role in a literal shit show.
What happened to no more shots?
It went out the window just like my dreams
I was not drunk enough for that final.
All I want is to get shitfaced and fuck random strangers is that really to much to ask?
Randomize
