dunno bout you, but i grow tired of beef curtains
p.s. you have a small clit
YOU ARE THE MOST AWKWARD PERSON ALIVE.
we may have ended up at a gay bar on accident. we're gonna work this to get free drinks.
He made a fake guest pass that was just a note card with "I'm here. Me." written in sharpie, and tried to convince the security guard it was real.
You were laying in bed whispering and crying to the half eaten burrito saying "why am I shitting so much" and "what did I do to deserve this"
we found him. outside on the balcony, sitting on a bucket, with his pants off, swearing he was'nt taking a dump
I wonder what blackout Alex would think of her?
probably "functioning vagina, must touch"
Maybe I'm just didn't notice and imagined a different penis as a Freudian coping mechanism?
Is eating fries while lying on the floor bad for you?
If I choke and die at least I will have been doing something I love
I'm pretty sure the guy in front of me at Walmart doesn't have good plans. It's one am he is buying a flash light and black bandanna
maybe facebook could make a notification like "someone tagged a photo of that guy you used to bang and still think is really hot with his shirt off"
i need some magic done to my vagina
You should of known that i was high if i refer to myself as melting into anything
Okay, this next statement may sound like a red flag but I'm tellin you, shotgunning those two beers really helped me love my child more effectively. Honest.
If we were teenagers we would intentionally be trying to burn down this historic landmark
Randomize
