And this is weird.. I feel slightly less depressed after shitting myself.
When it gets to the point that I'm more comfortable being naked at his house than my own, it's time to readdress the fuckbuddyship.
I forgot not everyone drinks wine out of the bottle. My grandma just asked if i needed a glass with a disappointing look.
I am now trying to reassure her that she doesn't have a wide-set vagina. So thanks, for whatever you said.
Drunk me thought he was hot enough to overlook the fact that he had poison ivy and still have sex with him. Sober me wants to know if you have any calamine lotion.
My liver just had a heart attack.
just got home to find my brothers naked on the floor covered in chocolate. i am now nervous about sleeping in the same room as them
Well ill be drunk so just come find me. Its like where in the world is Joey San Diego
Literally every boy I've dated is now in a somewhat successful band. My vagina has obviously been blessed by the rock gods.
I'm more of a "get high and take a bath" kinda guy.
I hate how she's getting mean with age
Meh, you can't hate. That's our basic life goal and you know it.
I was just informed that I asked for a glass of wine at the police station
I'm sure it would have gone very well with the cigarette you lit there.
Remind me to tell you about this weekend with them. It was the least fun I have ever had drinking. And I have thrown up pork and beer through my nose on the side of the freeway.
My mom is dancing slutty on the bar I need more drinks to be ok with this
Profesor just winked at me. This class might be easier than I thought
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