My mind said no, but my drink said yes.
So yesterday I was on craigslist and I saw a listing for a sofa-cum-bed. I knew what they meant...
I found those 18 whoppers we bought.
I wasn't expecting a boner of this magnitude
the awesomeness of being snowed in wore off after we ran out of beer and we realized we really didnt want to be stuck with everyone.
I still can't believe you had sex with someone who willingly went by Peaches.
The last time I saw you, you were rolling around on the ground at the bar.....
.....well it was bound to be an interesting night since I was chasing my pulls with pulls....
4 girls from the bar, me, strip basketball. here. NOW
She said we couldnt stop drinking until there were enough bottles to make a fort. so we could have sex in our "bottle castle"
Hangover or death. Death. I'll have a slice of death please.
I vaguely remember a pregnant lady reaching for my penis. When was I in an elevator?
Also, totally got laid in my yellow rubber boots and it was awesome.
I knew you were cut off when you tried to order a "Phil Collins"
I smoked a joint in the bathtub at 8 am then went back to bed
Yeah,I'm just gonna keep fucking other guys til this idiot figures out he loves me.
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