So he says "lean over this" which is a chain across the doorway, held into the wall with bolts. I do. Then he puts his weight on top of me to try and get it in.
It breaks. We fall.
I now have a broken nose, a concussion, and an infected, split lip. Why do I have the worst luck in guys?
I locked my keys in my car in front of planned parenthood. I'm terrified of going inside to ask to borrow a clothes hangar.
Just tell them you need to fix a mistake real quick.
You told her the u were going to wrap your dick around her neck and start her like a lawn mower. thats why she left.
even the sluttiest version of myself will not go down on him
all the sharp corners in my house are covered with litter foam blocks. al set for partying
I just blindly shoved it in. I'm still not sure which hole I got.
my mom just emptied my water bottle filled with vodka into the turtle tank.
Be there soon... with munchies, blow jobs and shoulder rubs.
You kept trying to throw the grocery cart off the balcony.
You know what the worst feeling in the world is? Sitting in your 6pm AA meeting still hungover from the night before
We left the bar and you kept yelling "ONWARD SCION, TO GLORY!!"
I'm allotting you four buildings to piss on tonight. Choose wisely.
I'm a full-grown woman and thusly I expect my sphincters to behave themselves.
feeding cats lunchmeat on my kitchen floor. come pour me another shot.
He sent me the milestone first dick pic this morning, it looked like a baby's fist holding a tree trunk. I'm frightened and aroused in equal measure.
Randomize
