i want to have as much fun as i did last weekend. but plus the condom and minus the fear.
the world took limewire and four lokos away from me in one week....hello depression
This is so pathetic it makes me miss snorting lines alone in my room listening to 'one more drink'.
Fuck my life, there's a fry in my vagina.
The party invite said "this ain't no lame stoplight party, you come to hookup or you don't come" I feel like their honesty deserves out attendance
Not to mention having our pick at the ensuing sausagefest
I give up. I can't handle that class sober any longer. I have an army of whiskey shooters for the next three weeks. Wish me luck.
Why did you fed-x me a peanut butter sandwich?
It seemed like the thing to do. There's popcorn on it too.
STOP smoking sooo much weed. Damn
My dad made a joke about you sending me strippers for valentine's day so clearly everything here is normal
but real talk, he made 1 phone call last night and had someone bring us tacos at 3am so idk I might be inlove
I think I'm actually too depressed to do drugs, wow.
My hookup from last weekend apparently got arrested today... his roommate just tagged me on facebook asking for bail money.
I will give him this, every time we go to the club he gets a stripper's actual number.
got cock blocked by the cops again. two of the cops were the same ones from that t bell incident and they recognized me... they still dont like me
as i was trying not to drunkingly fall off her toliet, i noticed her socks laying there. i quickly grabbed them, ran upstairs, and excitingly asked her if she had gotten them at sams club. she replied with, "...those are your socks."
That awkward moment when you were so fucking drunk lastnight that you and your fuck buddy wake up wearing eachother's clothing covered in hot cheetos with his cat curled up between your heads meowing. Thought you'd appreciate this moment with me.
Randomize
